Millennial unsure if friend really a friend or more of a passing networking opportunity

A millennial has realised she has no idea if a major person in her life is a friend or just a potential source of employment.

According to the woman, the embarrassing misunderstanding first arose when their usual conversation om LinkedIn became slightly too friendly. She explained that after the standard talk about multi-polar problem management strategy, things took a turn for the fraternal.

“She asked me if I wanted to go for brunch, but not to talk about the best ways to optimise our CV,” the woman told The Lampoon. “She was even going on about her favourite TV show from the 90s, and not because she wanted to pitch a throwback article about it to Vice.”

“I think she just wanted to talk to me. I’m a self-starter and I understand the gig economy: I’m ready to cannibalise this relationship to all hell, but it’s still left me really confused.”

After some more head scratching, the woman came to an epiphany. “She needs numbers for her slam poetry night! That explains the chumminess.”

After talking to the woman, our reporter sat hugging his knees in the shower for forty five minutes.

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