Reddit user closes multiple tabs of porn to tweet that WAP is “too sexual”

A local man made a scathing attack on Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion’s single ‘WAP’, in a post on Reddit this evening. He wrote the diatribe as soon as he’d removed the literal terabytes of online niche pornography that had been playing on his computer a moment ago.

The Reddit user – BasedAtheist – claimed that the song was profane, while hitting close on a bukkake scene. “How are these women gonna be respected?” he asked, before shutting down a video depicting something called a ‘tera-orgy’.  

The Reddit user claimed in his post he “hates even thinking about that song”, whose lyrics he clearly spent an hour googling. He opined online that “it’s inappropriate for this song to be everywhere”, and apparently thought the best way for it to die down would be to keep talking about it.

Discussion of the song continued for several hours on the subreddit r/It’sTheLeftWhoAreTheSnowflakes, to which BasedAtheist contributed lengthy paragraph after lengthy paragraph. Incensed by the song, he was apparently unaware that he didn’t have to listen to it.

He was quick to tell our reporter that his initial post received a whole eighty upvotes, which The Lampoon understands is an impressive feat. For comparison, WAP only has seventy million views on YouTube.

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